I've been utterly exhausted lately, and sleeping is not helping. I think it's because I'm working graveyard shift two days a week, and the nights I get regular sleep... well, I don't. I keep waking up during my R.E.M. sleep every single freakin' night... for like two to three weeks now. It's bad. I wake up still exhausted and sore- as if I'd only slept a few hours.
I worked myself even more sore Friday doing home repairs, which is rewarding but painful. I installed a few screens for some of the windows that needed them. I replaced our broken ceiling fan, which would have been such a simple task, if our ceiling wasn't so damn high. I guess we need a taller ladder, but I barely reached the wires, and one of us had to hold the fan while the other one spliced the wires together... so, uuunnnggghhh. But I got it all hooked up, and it works lovely! I am proud of my handiwork. Of course, the light on it is different. At the store I thought it looked nice and fit the woodwork and decor of the living room better... but when I got it up, my husband had to point out that I had bought a boob light. You know the ones I'm talking about, they are round with a metal piece in the middle. Yeah. Oops. Oh well. If your mind isn't in the gutter, it's elegant. If it is... it at least provides you with a good laugh, right?
Did I mention time seems like it's slowed down? Yeah... only halfway there. But still.. halfway there! I may start testing on Friday. I don't know. I'm pretty indecisive, and in the end I have to fight myself from testing early. I'm bad. I usually cave in.
Did I mention how much I hate waiting? I've had to wait so much for so many different things over the past 3 years... it's tiring.
I'm not really feeling it- but then again I never am. I'm just so jaded by everything. Not getting pregnant. Having miscarriage after miscarriage. I expect the worst at every turn now. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised one day. I'm not going to hold my breath on it, but it'd be nice.