Spinning round and round but going nowhere-

A and I decided to stop BCPs this month, rather than do one more month of BCPs. I just really didn't want to do it. I've been on 5 different brands of BCP and I haven't caught a break, and logistically trying one month early isn't going to make or break us. So, Thursday was my first inactive pill (the second to last pill in the pack, if you remember that this brand is not a normal triphasic). And I started waiting for CD1.

And I waited.

No cramping or anything. Given the fact that my issue with BCPs was constant break through bleeding, I started to wonder what could be going on. I did mess up my BCPs about 1.5-2 weeks ago... I took one 6 or so hours late, after we'd already, ahem, retired to the marital bed.

So given that, and the lack of CD1, I took a test last night. All we had was a stupid blue dye test... the most untrustworthy SOBs in the world. We got them last time I had a worry because, well, A went to the store without me and I think he said they were the cheapest. They were the cheapest for the reason... NEVER trust a blue dye test- words to live by. The first one in the pack worked fine months ago, but this time... well, I took it and came back a few minutes later... and it was positive. Which I am not stupid enough to trust, because those things are wonky and they can lie, but it still got me in a panic. I was shaking, because while it would be very welcome it was unexpected and geeze pregnancy is terrifying for me.

So A went out to procure me a First Response (yes, at midnight). In my 4 years TTC they became my go-to brand and I trust them. Apparently there was only one line open and a lady was in front of him with a cart full of stuff, and when she saw what he had in his hand and said (rather judgmentally), "Well, you can go first since it looks like you have an emergency." A told her, "No, not really." And the cashier jumped in with, "Not him, but someone has an emergency." I asked him how he replied, and he said he didn't... oh, I would love to complain... and I might. Here I was frantic for a more reliable test, because you know- if it WAS a real positive I would need to call the clinic and leave a message, because I would need immediate blood work and medication because MY BODY IS A TICKING TIME BOMB- I probably shouldn't call the store, because they'll probably get worse than they deserve... but damn. I really want to.

Anyway, so I took the more reliable test and... negative. Not even the hint of a line.

Thank you blue dye test for getting me all worked up over nothing. Now I know it was late, and I hadn't waited very long to retest, but I'm fairly certain that first one was a false positive.

Oh, and if you're wondering- where is CD1? Still not here. 3 days since my first inactive pill. I guess if it doesn't show by Monday I'll retest, but I am so over whatever is going on.

Barely even TTC again and already losing my mind -_-