Tuesday, April 7, 2009


I went in for my annual pap today.

I have to say, it was very reaffirming of our decision to leave my ob/gyn for my RE during this journey.

I had a doctor from the practice that I had never met before. Which is good I guess, I never told my ob/gyn that I was leaving for an RE... so I feel a little awkward about that whole thing.

My records had not been updated. Apparently they switched their filing system, and since I had not been in, I fell through the cracks. Who knows.

My first clue to this mishap was when she asked,"Are your menstrual cycles normal? Do they come at the same time every month."

Umm, no lady. They stopped coming a long long time ago. Thanks for asking.

So, then I had to fill her in from everything since the first miscarriage. Great, thanks.

As she's giving me the breast exam, she says to me, "Well, don't give up."
I give a meh. Mutter something about two years, and being a little jaded.

She continues on her all knowing spiel. "Don't give up. You know,"
Can you guess where this is going? Really?
Yes. The woman dared to say it, "most people stop trying, and it happens."

Why thank you. Thank you for reaffirming my reason for leaving your clinic.

I've said it once, I'll say it again.
Ob/gyn's know about pregnancy, and cervical paps. They don't know shit about reproduction.
An RE's priority is diagnosis and making babies.
So... I will throw my confidence in the specialist, and not the assvicer.
Thank you very much.


Celia said...

Let's leave her downtown in the middle of the night dressed only in a paper shirt with an open back.

Or we can banish her to hell and force her to call insurance companies for referrals...for eternity.

Another Dreamer said...

LOL! Thanks Celia. Sounds like a plan ;)

'Murgdan' said...

Holy CRAP! Yeah, that's pretty much what mine told me too...at my LAST visit. Blech. What is wrong with people...

WiseGuy said...

Ahhh! Did you ask the sweet nurse how many times she stopped trying before she scored?

How cold, indifferent and unprofessional!

Good that you switched...

Next time carry rotten tomatoes in the pocket....atleast you could target practice at your prev clinic!

Cara said...

That is so not their job. Sorry - but it's not. Do the exam and make your notes...but do not... especially in this case, in the words of Ms. McK, 'blow smoke up the patient's ass'.

Sorry - glad you know where you need to be.

G$ said...

That's exactly why I had my RE do my annual.

Michelle said...


Mrs. Olson said...

Ugh...I got this as well when I had my HSG...there was this smiling woman nurse in the room that said all it took was "cleaning out the pipes" and bam she was pregnant. People like that should be publicly humiliated...I like Celia's idea...Hoping you only have to go there again when you don't have to hear such nonsense. Hugs!!!

Kristin said...

I can't believe anyone would be stupid enough to say that. I guess I got really spoiled because my OB and his wife were infertility patients themselves.

Anonymous said...

I love Celia's idea. I'm sorry that you had to go through that. I start getting really irritable when I have to explain the entire story AGAIN and AGAIN.

I seriously think that we all know way much more about IF than a regular ob/gyn.

I'm debating about going back to my ob/gyn for a monitored femara cycle, since insurance will cover so much more with him, but I'm dreading dealing with their stupid office and nurses and pregnant patients in the waiting room. I'm trying to decide if it's worth the $600 for 2 ultrasounds and an IUI at my RE, or just ~$250 at my ob's office plus all the aggravation.

A Decade of BFNs said...

Amen!! That is how I felt w/ all the doctors in the ER and hospital during my last m/c...they just didn't know ANYTHING!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for posting this - it reminded me again why I need to find a new OB before my next pap smear or else suffer similar torture yet again. So far she has told me that if I just relax it will happen (and offered drugs to do that), told me if we stop trying it will happen (funny, but we have NO sperm!), and that we should just adopt because her brother did and it was easy and they are so happy. People drive me insane!

Shelby said...

Oh, Gawd. When I first read her, "don't give up", I knew something stupider was about to come out of her mouth and boy was I right. Seriously, if I hear one more person keep perpetuating the great myth of infertiles getting pregnant when they stop trying (as if this is the rule or even common) I might just lose it on them. Sorry you had to hear that! Such ignorance!

Guera! said...

I like Celia's advice about leaving her downtown in the middle of the night dressed in only a paper shirt with an open back. A fitting punishment I think.