Friday, September 10, 2010

As if we expected any other outcome-

No mature follicles. No surprise there.

We're treating today as CD3 instead, and I'm taking 7.5mg of Femara. I go back on the 20th... we'll see how things look then, I suppose.

I feel like a freak of nature sometimes. Can't ovulate. Can't respond to treatments. Can't stay consistent in responding. Can't get pregnant. Can't stay pregnant.

If reproduction were our business, we'd be bankrupt and destitute.

My doctor is so sweet though, and she really wants to get us pregnant. She's saving me boxes of injectable medication, in the hopes that we'll do one more cycle of it. They're in their office with my name on them, as she said. She's going to keep saving them, right now it's not quite enough for a whole cycle... but about halfway there, so that's something. I am so thankful for such a kind and educated doctor, they are so hard to come by.

So, right now we're doing 7.5mg Femara. If I respond we might do another cycle of it. We might even do an injectable cycle sometime in the future. We'll see.

I still haven't went out to see the new nephew- we're so busy with all this stuff going on this weekend, and I just really can't handle it right now... need some time and space. Plus, I'm sure they need to adjust.

My mother-in-law made me cry a little bit the other day. On her FB update about her new grandson, someone asked how many grandchildren she had now. She told them she has 2 biological, 1 blessed through marriage, and 3 in heaven. It made me pause and reminded me how much it does affect others, even if they never mention it. My own mother would never count my lost ones, when someone asks her how many she has she doesn't even mention my niece who was stillborn. So often people glaze over them, even I do sometimes because it's easier than explaining... anyway, it just gave me pause to reflect, and it really touched me.

6 comments:

adsf said...

That was sweet of your mother-in-law. :)
Sucks about the follicles, ugh. But if you're referring to Dr. J, I know she's taking good care of you.

Anonymous said...

What a sweet MIL you have. Mine would never think like that! You are very lucky. I'm so sorry about the follicles. Keeping my fingers crossed that the Femara gets some response.

Hugs.

Kristin said...

I'm so sorry your ovaries are continuing to fight back.

It was incredibly sweet that your MIL remembered your little angels.

Jessi Wallace said...

I'm so glad you have such a thoughtful MIL. That makes a huge difference, especially when your own mom isn't as supportive. I am also glad you have a dr who actually cares! You know how I feel about good dr's... they ARE hard to come by and are worth holding onto, even if the drive is an hour away. I firmly believe that her belief in your ability get pregnant WILL help you get pregnant.

janis said...

I totally heart your mother-in-law.
((hugs)) to you.

Anonymous said...

Crap. I'm sorry that there weren't any mature follicles. That's good that they are letting you take another round of femara now. I hope the 7.5 works.

What a great doctor, saving up injectable meds for you! I hope you don't end up needing them, but if you do, that is awesome of her.

Wow, that is so great that MIL remembered your babies.