Positives-

Thanks for all the kind words on my last post. I really needed to vent that out, I'm really hoping things go smoothly on Sunday... but A- and I both have our doubts. I'm going to have A- and my best friend as support/backup so hopefully that'll give me the strength to get through this. I'm scared though.

There have been some positive things lately though, so I thought I'd share those!

We'll be 30wks on Saturday. That's exciting! Every week Nombie's still with us is absolutely amazing.

A couple days before the ultrasound, I was feeling my abdomen and noticed that there was a lump on the left side. I commented to A- that I thought it was Nombie's head. I kept feeling it leading up to the ultrasound. We had the ultrasound and confirmed it was indeed his head poking out there. So. freaking. weird. He's moved since the ultrasound, I'm not sure where his head is now. I think he might be head up again, or maybe laying sideways from the right now. Really not sure.

I keep going back and looking at the 3d ultrasound photos. It's just so surreal knowing that he's in there, and he's so stinking cute. There are some sequential shots where he puckers his face up, sticks his tongue out, then starts sucking his thumb. Like, for serious, there's a baby in there. That always hits me after every ultrasound, and I'm always amazed by it. Like, I know there's a baby in there, but after I see him again it really just hits me anew without fail. It never gets old.

Nombie was really active the days following the ultrasound. It was nice feeling some strong solid movement, and not just a handful of movement a day. I mean, he was going at it! I get so worried since I really don't feel him very often. Since he's moved from my left, I haven't been feeling him as much again. It was nice while it lasted.

A couple days ago, A- finally felt Nombie move from the outside. I've been feeling Nombie on the outside for weeks, but my hands always just happen to be on my belly when he moves. Movement is so unpredictable, and the only way to catch it is when it's up top. A- hasn't felt any big kicks/punches, it was just some squirming. I feel a lot of squirming where Nombie's head is, he likes to jam it against my uterine wall/placenta at the top. So when he turns it's this weird twisting feeling. Sometimes it can be felt from the outside. Of course, the next day A- was doubting he felt anything, saying it felt like a twitch and he wasn't sure. But it was. And he felt squirming again the next day. But, no solid hard kicks/punches.

The other day we were at a store, and there was a really good sale going on this crib they had. I was planning on waiting until the end of this month to buy a crib, but A- really wanted to get this crib since the deal was really good (and of course, the sale expired the next day). So... we bought a crib. Yeah. We haven't opened it yet, it's sitting in the nursery in it's box waiting. We should probably open it and make sure it doesn't have any missing parts/scratches... but I don't know if I want to just yet. Buying it was scary enough!
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We have a busy weekend ahead of us:

Friday we have another appointment with my OB so we'll see how that goes.

Saturday, October 15th, is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. We'll be taking a pause and lighting our candle at 7pm in honor of all the babies we've lost, as well as for anyone else who has lost a child. Sadly, many members of the ALI community that I follow or am friends with have lost children this year, and my heart goes out to them. I'll be posting about Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day on my FB and on here too, like I do every year.

Then Sunday is the baby shower. I'll be sure to post about that; but I might need to process things first, so the post might take a few days for me to spit it out. It's only two hours... that's what I keep telling myself. Maybe less if we're lucky.